Come Back When You Can
by believesvueo
Summary: Author's Note: I don't usually write femlash but I am such a big fan of Rizzoli & isles, so I thought I would attempt to write one.
1. Chapter 1

**Come Back When You Can **

Author's Note: I don't usually write femlash but I am such a big fan of Rizzoli & isles, so I thought I would attempt to write one.

"_Oh, how the world seem so unfair Creating a love that cannot be shared As you go your way, and i go mine Our light will shine, and it will be me…" _– It Will be Me by Melissa Etheridge

**Six months earlier…**

Maura Isles never thought that love could hurt this much. She never thought it was possible to not want to feel anything. Every word Jane spoke to her that night pierced through her heart. It played over and over again like a broken record. She pleaded with Jane to think about it and no not end what they have. But Jane was determined and her heart.

"_Jane please. I mean, why? It might seem hard at first, but you know, people will get sued to it."_

"_Maura I worked to hard to be where I am. And there's nothing and no one in this world that could be more important than my job and my family. I can't. I will not be the talk of the precinct because of this. And I will not have my family disown me because of you. No way, Maura."_

"_So without even trying, you are ending our relationship? You don't even know if that is how your family will react. Gay marriage is legal in Boston, you really think the people you work with would care?"_

"_I do. And there's no way I am willing to take that chance. As for my family, I am not even going there regarding whatever this is that we have."_

"_What we have. Or we had was a relationship Jane. Don't you think I feel what you feel? I have never had this happened to me before but I am willing to try. I am willing to put my reputation and my job on the line for you."_

"_Well, that's the difference between you and me. I am not."_

"_S you are saying I am not worth it."_

_Hey you said it not me."_

"_I don't have to. I'm just going to get my things."_

Maura took the last of her stuff that night. She can still recall how much it broke her heart to see Jane not feel half the pain she was feeling that night. But she held her head up high and walked out the door.

**Four months earlier…**

It has been two months since they broke up. It's been two months since she let Maura walk out the door. It broke her heart to say the things she said to Maura but it was for the best. She could not give up her job nor risk being disowned by her family because of their relationship. She loved and still loves Maura. She misses what they had. She lost her best friend that night.

Jane though enough time had past and maybe, she can try to at least repeai their broken friendship.

They had just closed a case and thought, she should ask Maura to join her, Frost and Korsak for a celebration at the bar. Ever since that night, she and Maura only spoke about work. Korsak and Frost asked but she just waved them away and told them it was none of their business.

It was obvious that something had gone on between her and Maura. The air was filled with tension every time they went down to the morgue. Maura no longer addressed her by first name. It was either Rizzoli or Detective. The light in her eyes were gone and she could only see sadness.

Jane sauntered into the morgue looking for Maura.

She stopped in her tracks when she saw Maura in a red dress and in a hurry.

"Maura."

"I am in a hurry. I will see you on Monday.'

"Oh. It looks like you have a date tonight?"

The phone rang and Maura held up a finger.

"_Hi. Yeah, I''m ready. I'm sorry that you had to wait another hour. I will see you at the front. Bye."_

"I'm happy for you, Maura."

"Thanks. I really have to go."

"Who is he? Or she?"

"You don't get to ask me that Jane. Not anymore."

For the first time, Jane now knows how Maura felt that night.

Two months ago…

Jane, Frost and Korsak were sitting at a booth drinking beer.

They were laughing and having a good time. Frost turned his head toward the door and Jane noticed the look on his face. Jane followed his gaze and there was Maura holding hands with Mike Wilson, the Team Leader in Counter Terrorism.

"Oh, there's Dr. Isles. So the rumors are true, she's dating Wilson. He's a great guy. " Korsak said.

"I think we should invite them over to our booth." Frost suggested.

Before Jane could protest, she saw that Maura and her date were already heading towards their booth.

"Hello, Dr. Isles."

"Barry, please call me Maura. We are not at work. By the way, I'd like you to meet Mike Wilson."

"We've ran into each other before. Hey Mike, I'm Vince Korsak. That's Barry Frost and this is Jane Rizzoli."

"Nice to meet you, detectives. I have heard so much about you guys from Maura of course and also, your impeccable reputation around the precinct. Can we join you guys?"

"Sure."

"We just came from dinner across the street."

Throughout the night, Jane listened and observed Mike and Maura.

She'd join in so not to make it obvious that she really isn't enjoying the night. Seeing Maura and Mike kiss and flirt was not her idea of a good time. But she couldn't do that to Maura. As Maura said, she had no right.

**Present Day…**

Jane Rizzoli was running late and as the elevator opened to her floor, she heard voices. She looked up and saw Maura, Frost, Korsak, Chief Cavanaugh and Mike Wilson. They were laughing and the moment she saw Maura's face, she knew something special happened and the news will break her heart.

"Oh, there's Rizzoli."

"Hello, Chief. What's going on?"

"Well, it seems like Detective Wilson and Dr. Isles here have an announcement."

"Well, I asked Maura last night to marry me and she said "yes."

Jane felt like the world had come crashing down on her. All of sudden, she felt sick and couldn't breathe.

"I'm so happy for you Maura and Mike. Congratulations."

"I'm the luckiest man in the world. I have been waiting a couple of years to ask this beautiful woman out and finally, I got up the nerve to do it. Thank God, she said yes."

"Oh, Mike."

"He is, Maura." Jane blurted out.

"Thank you, Jane. I think we all need to go back to work."

Jane wasn't able to concentrate at work. She couldn't think. Maura is getting married.

Finally, Jane got up from her and chair and made her way to the morgue.

"Maura."

"Jane? What are you doing here?"

"Can we talk later, please?"

"About what?"

"Just please. I can either come over your house or you can come over to mine."

"Let me just check with Mike if he has anything planned for us tonight."

"_Hey. Do you have anything planned for us tonight?" _

"_That's fine if you are working late. I'm going over to Jane's place. I will call you, later. Yeah, I love you too."_

"So what time do you want me to come over?"

"Around 7 o'clock."

"Okay. Should I bring wine?"

"I got that taken care of. I will see you tonight, Maura."

"_I've been led on To think that we've been Trying for too long.  
Every time we drift We're forcing what is wrong. At last that voice is gone…" – _Come Back When You Can by Barcelona

Jane paced back and forth waiting for Maura to arrive. She had just about worn out the wood flooring in her apartment. She has never been so nervous in her life.

She jumped when she heard the door bell.

She opened the door and there stood, the most beautiful thing she has ever laid eyes on. Maura Isles.

"So here I am. What did you want to talk about?"

"Can we just eat first?"

"Sure."

Tension filled the air. It felt strange to talk to Mauar again. It's been six months since the last time she was here. It was the night she broke Maura's heart. It was the night she saw tears coming down that beautiful face of hers. For months now, she wanted to mend what she had done but she first had to come to terms with who she is and what she wants. And no matter how much she argued with herself, it always ended up with not being able to live a life without Maura. She can only hope that it's not too late.

After dinner, they sat down on the couch that is so familiar to both of them.

"So Jane, you wanted to talk, let's talk.'

"Maura, I hope that it's not too late. Maura, I love you. I'm sorry that I said those things to you six months ago. But I was confused. I had to come to terms with who I am on my own."

Maura cried.

"Jane you don't know how long I wanted to hear you say those words. But I can't Jane. I am marrying Mike."

"Maura, please just give me another chance."

"Jane, do you know why I fell for Mike? He never asked me for anything. He just loves me. With you, I had to beg you to love me. I begged you to fight for me, for us. But you said I was not worth it. You told me that nothing and no one in this world was worth losing your job and being disowned by your family. I have never felt so worthless in my life than I did that night. I never felt pain like that. When I told Mike, that I may not be able to love him as much as he loves me, you know what he said? He said it's okay because the love he has for me is enough for both of us. Six months ago, there was nothing I would want more than for you to say the words you just said earlier but it's too late Jane. Mike and I, we are going to have a baby. I can't be with you, ever. Goodbye, Jane."


	2. Chapter 2

**Come Back When You Can Part 2**

Five Years Later…

"_You don't wanna hurt me, But see how deep the bullet lies. Unaware that I'm tearing you asunder. There's a thunder in our hearts, baby. So much hate for the ones we love? Tell me, we both matter, don't we?..." _Running Up That Hill by Placebo

Jane was concentrating on her report that was due in an hour. Cavanaugh has been on her ass about finishing her report on their last case. She felt every bone and every muscle in her body hurt. She really needs to go on vacation. She had been working non-stop and it has taken its toll on her body. Korsak and Frost have approached her about her state but a single glare from her made them back off. They could only shake their heads. They love and care for Jane and don't want to see her fall further down. She was one hell of a detective but anybody who knew Jane, they would know that she's not fine at all.

Her family tried talking to her especially her mother, but getting through Jane was impossible.

She buried herself in work and the light that used to be in her eyes is now replaced with sadness.

As Jane continued to write out her report, a voice of a child, a little girl in fact, disturbed her concentration. As she looked up to see where it was coming from, she saw a face that has haunted her day and night for the past five years. That beautiful face she had missed so much. She blinked twice just to make sure that she is not seeing things.

"Maura?"

"Hello Jane." _God that smile, Jane thought, could still make her heart jump. She never thought it was possible for Maura to even look more beautiful but she is even more so than she last remembered._

"Oh my God, it really is you. What are you doing here?"

"I'm…"

"Mommy."

Jane smiled at the little girl as she pulled on Maura's skirt. There was no mistaking that she is Maura's daughter. The curly blonde hair and those eyes that she could get lost in, as she in now, are the same as the woman in front of her.

"Mommy, she's Aunt Jane isn't she?"

"Yes, I am. And what's your name, little girl?"

"AJ."

"AJ?"

"It's short for Allison Jane. I was named after you."

Jane was speechless. She could not believe that Maura had named her daughter after her.

"Wow. Maura. I don't know what to say.' Jane pulled Maura and hugged her. _She inhaled Maura's scent and it filled her with warmth that she had stopped feeling for five years._

"I have missed you so much, Maura." Jane whispered.

"You still haven't told me what you are doing here. Where's Mike?"

Jane noticed the sadness in Maura's eyes.

"My Dad died." _She heard the little girl say and it broke her heart._

"What? When? How?"

"He was shot, Aunt Jane. He was catching the bad guy and the bad guy shot him." _Jane knelt in front of the little girl and lifted her up. She saw the same sadness in her eyes. She hugged the little girl tighter and then kissed her on the cheek before putting her down._

"I'm so sorry Maura.'

"Jane, can we maybe talk about this later?"

"Sure. So how long are you here in Boston?"

"We are here to stay. I came to the station to see about a job. Looks like I'm your M.E. again."

They held each other's gaze until they heard familiar male voices coming from across the room arguing.

"I told you, Korsak, you can't just talk to her like that. I swear you are hopeless."

"Frost, mind your own business. Also. What? Oh…Is that you, Doc?" Korsak asked.

"Doctor Isles?" Frost asked who was also in shock.

"Hello Vince. Hello Barry. Yes, it's really me."

"And who is that beautiful little girl holding on to Detective Rizzoli's leg?"

"I'm AJ."

"Hey, Doc, she's mini you. Is she as smart as you?"

"Actually Vince, I think she's smarter. "

"Really? So AJ, how would you like to help me and Uncle Barry with the computer? Do you know anything about computers?"

"Oh, yes Uncle Vince. Can I call you that? You see the first computer was built…"

"Oh my God Maura, she is so you."

"That's what Mike used to say. But it's true what I said earlier, AJ''s IQ at this age is higher than mine was at the same age."

"How are you Maura? How's AJ?"

"We're fine. It's been about six months since it happened. I think it really helped that AJ is so smart. I decided to move back here to Boston because I know it's what's best for me and her. Mike's parents are here. My parents said they will be home more often now because they want to spend more time with AJ. And my friends are here. You're here Jane. I missed you so much. I wanted to call you so badly after Mike died but…"

"I understand. I wished that you did though. I would have been there for you. We all would have."

"I know. Listen, Aj and I will meet you later okay? So, 7 o'clock enough time for you?"

"It's perfect. I will see you and AJ later."

She watched Maura and AJ and she couldn't stop the smile on her face. It's been so long since she had felt this happy. Her best friend is back and the world seemed right again.

"_Come back, I'll help you stand. Let go and hold my all you wanted was me, I'd give you nothing less. So come back when you can…"_


	3. Chapter 3

**Come Back When You Can Chapter 3**

"_Come back when you can. Let go, you'll understand. You've done nothing at all to make me love you less. So come back when you can…" _

Jane left the precinct as soon as she turned in her report to Cavanaugh. She had to do some grocery shopping and also clean her apartment.

The thought of Maura coming to her apartment again made her smile. Seeing Maura again and feeling her warmth made her think of all the good times that they have shared. Those thoughts kept her going the last five years. They have so much to talk about and she has so many things she wants to tell Maura.

But then again, she thought about the possibility that even though Mike is no longer in the picture, Maura may never want to have a romantic relationship with her. She may just want to be friends with her, which to Jane is perfectly fine. She will take whatever Maura is willing to give her. And then there's Maura's adorable daughter, AJ. She couldn't help but smile a little more as she thought about AJ. She can't believe that Maura has a daughter. Maura's life is different now and she promised herself not too expect much.

Jane inspects the table one more time just to make sure that everything is there. The door bell rang and she took a deep breath before taking a step to answer the door.

As soon as she opened the door, she was greeted by the adorable four year old with a hug.

"Aunt Jane, we brought you something."

"Hello to you, AJ. Hi Maura."

"Mommy, did you tell Aunt Jane to make my favorite? Spaghetti with lots of meat balls. You know her name sounds Italian so I assume she knows how to make it. Di you Aunt Jane?"

"I did, AJ. And I also have here your favorite drink. Pomegranate juice."

Jane looks over to Maura.

"She definitely is your daughter. What four year old drinks pomegranate juice and can even pronounce it?" Jane whispered.

"Oh, Jane, stop."

"You know Aunt Jane, I can hear you. Mom said I have bionic ears which is impossible. There's no such thing as bionic ear if you are a human being. Oh Mom, she has a tortoise too."

"Oh my God Jane, is this Albert?"

"It is. He's as big as Bass. How is Bass?"

"He is still alive. And he's here with us in Boston, of course."

"So, are you two ladies hungry? Maura, I made Mom's famous gnocchi and bread sticks. Sit down so we can start eating. Let me open that bottle of wine."

"How are your parents, by the way Jane? And Frankie?"

"Mom and Dad are fine. Tommy took over the business. Dad still helps out but Tommy is the main plumber now. He finally straightened out and is married now. Frankie, well, he's finally made detective."

"Wow. I bet you're very proud."

"We all are."

"So AJ, how do you liKe your spaghetti?"

"Oh, Aunt Jane it is the best spaghetti I have had. And I am not just saying that to make you happy. It really is. You see, I am just like Mom. I can't lie. I hyperventilate when I do. My heart rate goes up and I feel like fainting. I think it's genetic."

"AJ, are you really just four? I mean, all these words you are using, you know most four year olds can't even say them."

"Mom said that I'm not like most four year olds but she told me not to feel weird about it. And that I am special."

"You are, AJ."

"Aunt Jane, Mom told me that you play baseball?"

"I did when I was in school and I still do whenever we have the Boston PD Annual baseball game. Do you like baseball?"

"I do. I find it fascinating. The velocity and the speed of the ball when the pitcher pitches and the power and how fast the batter hits it once it makes contact."

Jane sat in awe of the four year old, even more. She looks at Maura and shook her head.

"hey, don't look at me Jane, that's all her. In fact, this little lady here is a sports buff. I think she got that from you."

"really, you are AJ?"

"I am, Aunt Jane. I was wondering, if Mom would not mind, you can take me to a Red Sox game. Then we can also go to a Celtics game and also the Patriots.'

"Oh my God Maura, she may look like you but I am starting to doubt she is your daughter. And AJ, I'd be happy to take you to a game."

AJ ran to Jane and gave her a kiss on cheek.

"Thanks, Aunt Jane. I finished my food, Mom. Can I go to the room and read?"

"Sure, sweetie. How about you take your back pack and bring it to Aunt Jane's bedroom?"

"Okay, Mom. I love you Mom. And I love you too, Aunt Jane."

Jane almost cried when she heard AJ say those three words to her.

"Oh, Jane. Are you okay?"

"Wow. AJ, she is such an amazing child."

"She's very sweet, as you can see. She knows all about you, Jane. Even if she only met you today, I told her all about you. She knows you are Mommy's best friend."

"Thank you for telling her about me."

"Aj is very observant. She noticed that I would get sad sometimes even before Mike died."

"I told her I missed her Aunt Jane. I would look at our pictures together and I will tell her the stories behind the pictures."

"I've missed you too, so much more than you could ever imagine, Maura. I'm so sorry about Mike."

"Mike made me happy Jane. He was such a great man."

"I know. That's why I had to let you go and accept defeat."

"How are you, Jane really?"

"I'm better now that you are here."

"Has there been anybody?"

"To be honest, no. I tried so hard to fall in love, Maura but nobody measured up to you Maura. I just couldn't. So I buried myself in work.'

"Oh, Jane that is not healthy. When I saw you earlier, my heart broke. You looked so tired and sad."

"It wasn't your fault Maura. You know when you left, my world literally stopped. I could not do anything. I could only cry and the pain was so much, I just wanted to sleep. But then I realized that what I was feeling at that time could not compare to what you must have felt when I rejected you not only once but three times. When I look back at those days, half of the pain I felt was because I caused you pain. I was so confused Maura. I thought that if I pushed you away, things would be easier. But I was wrong."

"Jane, I want to tell you why I left."

"Maura, you don't have to. You had every right to leave."

"I know I did but I want to tell you it wasn't because I didn't love you. In fact, it was because I loved you too much. But I was with Mike and carrying his child. I couldn't do that to him nor to you. If I had stayed here, feeling what I felt for you and knowing that you felt as strongly as I did, I knew I would never have been able to stay faithful with Mike. And he did not deserve that. I could not break his heart like that. I also would never want to ruin you Jane. If I stayed and we carried on an affair, it would ruin your reputation and I know how hard you worked to be where you are. And I also could never put AJ through any pain. I love her Jane. She is my life."

"I know. Thank you for telling me that it was because you loved me too much that's why you left."

"You know for a long time, I felt guilty that I could not love Mike the way I loved you. I think he's always known that it was you that held the key to my heart. But, he never said anything. Before he died, told me five things: 1) that he loved me and AJ. 2) To take care of AJ. 3) To come back to Boston 4) To be happy and to be where my heart always belonged 5) He thanked me for loving him and for making him the happiest man while he was alive."

"Maura, your happiness was all I ever wanted. I have always believed that everything happens for a reason. You met Mike for a reason and that reason is AJ. Can you imagine your life without that beautiful little girl? I'd imagine you would not trade her for anything."

"No, I won't Jane."

"So, where do we go from here?"

"I don't know Jane. I have AJ to think about now."

"I know, Maura. And I think that we should start from the beginning. Let's be friends again. I really have missed my best friend. And I would never do an


End file.
